"Beauty In Walking Away"

A light shines off in the distance

A pale flickering glow

How many times do I have to dream that I could be there

The time is here and she won't be waiting for me to find the easy way out

I've lost count of the days that were wasted

There's an answer in the sound of a train

There is wisdom past the bridge on the bay

There's a lifetime through the fog, in the rain

There's a beauty in walking away

I float on the streets that are empty

Take the path that the wind only knows

Tonight is the last time that I'll ever be here

There's an answer in the sound of a train

There is wisdom past the bridge on the bay

There's a lifetime through the fog, in the rain

There's a beauty in walking away

It's never quite simple, it's never that safe

It never seems perfect until it's too late

It's never the right time to find a new way

There's an answer in the sound of a train

There is wisdom past the bridge on the bay

There's a lifetime through the fog, in the rain

There's a beauty in walking away 

~ Marie Digby "Beauty In Walking Away"

Rise and shine... and jump into the shower to FULLY wake up!

Up at 5:00 this morning with an amazingly cranky baby. Got the girls up, fed, dressed, and out the door headed to school. Drove Annabelle to work. Grabbed some coffee.... wait... not just "coffee"... this morning I am starting my day off with a

"Venti Peppermint White Mocha"

  D-E-L-I-C-O-U-S-N-E-S-S!

 **A special shout out the Annbelle (aka. my Housie Homie) for introducing me to this drink. I LOVE LOVE LOVE it!!!**

So, today is a busy day. Job interview at 1:00.... saying prayers, crossing my fingers AND toes, thinking good thoughts.... anything and everything that could possibly help me. 

Then I have a ton of work that I need to do to prepare for next weeks vendor fair. I have been slacking when it comes to creating new pieces. BUT I am feeling so refreshed and inspired lately... so, I think today will be an amazing day for creating! 

Oh! Also need to finish creating my fan page on Facebook for Bushing Out Loud. AND I need to get my ETSY store up and running.... Crazy busy day ahead... but I ♥ it!

Amazing changes... more to come....

So, 2009 brought about some amazing changes in my life.  It was by far the craziest, most randomly amazingly, wonderfully scary year of my life. So many firsts... so many changes.  A year of ups and downs, highs and lows.... good and not so good... but after all that has been said and done, I can say, when looking back, I learned so much about myself last year... about the woman I am and more importantly, about the woman I WANT to be. I have a long way to travel, but I know that not only will I get there, but the journey will so be worth it.
One of my greatest struggles over the past few years has been with my weight. It has seriously been a major issue with me for the past 6 years. But I am now closer to my goal than I have ever been!!!! I am CRAZY PROUD to proclaim that since January of 2009 I have lost....
drum roll please......
75 lbs!!!!!!! I worked really hard to get here and am so proud that after 6 years of struggling with this, I have finally made it this far.... only 10 more pounds till I am at my goal...!!!!!!!
Here is a before and after....

          Before                                                   

                        

             After

     

I am so excited about what this year has in store for me and for the people that I love. I can't wait to see what amazing adventures lie in my future....

Getting Digital....

So, it has been FOREVER since I have done anything creative. Literally F-O-R-E-V-E-R! So, today, I grabbed my Mac and headed out to Panera... ♥ their latte's... they are amazing...
I sat in one of the big comfy chairs and logged onto Scrapblog for the first time in almost 6 months. I had so much fun sitting there... had my head phones on... listed to my FAVORITE playlist in Itunes... it's called Sweetness. It is filled with some of my favorite artist.... Matt Wertz, Jason Mraz, Josh Kelly, James Morrison, Pete Schmidt, Nathan Angelo... and my obsession of the day... Marie Digby. I am so in love with her song "Voice on the Radio".
Anyways... I was so excited because as soon as I sat down and started to play around with the different elements I became SO inspired! I was able to create a few layouts, as well as my new banner (see above), that I really like.

This is one of the first layouts that I have created in months that I am actually really fond of!! Just looking at it, I am totally inspired and want to do some more creating!!! And now, I am even more comfortable... sitting in my big comfy bed... hopefully I will be able to get some creating done tonight before I pass out... I have lost my night owl tendencies... even despite all the Red Bull... oh, how I love my Red Bull...

I'm back...

"Lost for so long

fighting to get me back

walking around 

nothing kept me on track

hand over my eyes

not a sight worth seeing

laughing on the outside

to hide my true being

walking around

so aimlessly

reaching from the inside

grasping to find me...

lost in a world

of total confusion

hypocrisy and lies

a state of illusion

true to myself

i am once more

if its not what you like

then theres the door

heads on straight

heart of a child

eyes to the lord

my hearts gone wild

figuring myself out

not a moment too soon

push away the fairytales

there's just no more room

push it all away

bring reality back to me

open to it now

my hearts been set free 

freedom to breath

just give me my time

a blessing... a curse

either way its a sign

I've come back to me

I've gotten what's mine

living a life of my own

since when is that a crime?"

~Jessica Goetke 2009