I have a daily devotional that I read from each day. But, I get a little bored just going through it page by page. I have found that when I just open the book to a random page, the verse seems to be exactly what I am looking for. And, today was no exception....
Ask, and God will give to you. Search, and you will find.
Knock, and the door will open for you.
Yes, everyone who asks will receive.
Everyone who searches will find.
And everyone who knocks will have the door opened.
Matthew 7:7-8
It seems like I am turning to God more and more in life. In my quest to be "independent" in life... to be able to get things done "on my own", I have discovered that the more faith I put in God.... the more I turn to him, the more strength I have to move forward in life. The more I tried to be "independent" in life, I found that I found myself beginning to feel empty inside. I know... um, hello! Should have been obvious to me..
"Shoulda.... coulda.... woulda...."
Those three words will get you NO WHERE in life. There will always be things that we could have done better. Times we could have tried harder. Things that we wish we would have done differently. In the past I would spend a good amount of time focusing on things that I wish I would have done better or differently. Yes, it is good to learn from your mistakes. But there is a BIG difference between learning from your mistakes and dwelling on them. If you are dwelling on something, you are not moving forward. And, if you are not moving forward in life... well, what's the point?
I have this theory on "dwelling" on things. And, to be quite honest (because thats what this blog is about for me; being completely honest with how I think and feel), it just came to me as I am writing this. I have been looking back and thinking about the people or situations in life that I am having trouble "letting go" of. I have been wondering
"Why am I having such a hard time letting go?"
And, to be honest, I think people (or at least me...lol) dwell on certain situations, because it is easier in a way than moving on. It is often easier to focus on one thing that went bad.... on a situation where you were let down or where you were hurt, then it is to move on in life and open your heart up for another let down.
Life is going to be full of people who hurt you... full of times when things don't go your way... this past week has been a HUGE example of that for me. Definitely shed a tear or two this past week. BUT... I am going to let myself feel what I need to, but after that, after my heart is done shedding tears over it, I am going to move on. Life is too short and time is too precious to stand still in life. If you stand still for too long, you get comfortable where you are. I want to be in a world were I am always moving, well, lol, not always. But, I don't want to ever get to the point again where I am too afraid to take a step forward. As cliche' as it is, the FIRST step is always the hardest. There will always be hardships in life, but the more you put yourself out there, the stronger you will be.
If you know me at all, then you know that I wear my heart on my sleeve in life. I even have a tattoo of a heart on my wrist. I was asked when I went to get it, "Didn't your Mother ever tell you not to wear your heart on your sleeve?" I replied, "No, she didn't." I trust my heart. When all else failed in life.... when I felt like I had no where else to turn.... when I began to feel empty and alone.... I would sit and close my eyes. I would listen to what my heart was telling me. I trust my heart. Yes, I know, I said that already. But, I do. So often when I am "confused" about something in life, if I sit and just quietly listen, my heart has the answers. I just have to be willing to listen.
So.... here is to listening to your heart....
Always Blushing,
♥
Jessica
